“3 Cultures Molding My Thoughts ” by Bonny Mills
June 18, 2009
Hello all. I went with a team of 5 other friends to Asha Deep just outside New Delhi in September 2007. Never expecting how much my life would change in such a few months, I moved to China for a new job a month before our trip. Being separated from my teammates and missing the last bit of preparation made it a bit hard keeping alive the excitement that I was going to India. I also was swamped with my work and had to dive right in - relearning about Chinese culture and the education system. Working in a private school for kids with rich parents and then going to the slums and then back to the rich ones was such a yo-yo for me I really didn’t know how to do deal with it all. Having to be back at my school again, I missed the final good-byes in India and later all the debriefing back in New York with my team. I was alone in a 3rd foreign country to resolve and deal with all that I had seen, heard, and touched.
What impacted me the most and many have shared this is the joy of these kids. They just have the hugest smiles on their faces and light up from ear to ear when you see them. Language doesn’t even have to be a barrier. Just our presence made their day. At other times, observing the children of the slums, it broke my heart seeing them playing in the mountains of garbage or even having to help earn their family’s living by sorting out recyclables at the age of 7.
For me, my highlight was working with the children with disabilities. My sister is adopted from India and had polio as a child. She has had numerous surgeries and today wears a leg brace with just a slight limp. Back in New Delhi, at the special education school, I saw kid after kid with the effects of polio and no chance for surgeries to correct it. Yet they didn’t let that stop them. They scooted around as if that was how everyone did it and didn’t let their disability weigh them down. Other times, I would see a classmate or friend help them put a toy or book away, carry their bag or hold their hand as they hobbled down the stairs.
Every day I would go back to this group of children because of the instant gratification we both got. It was a chance to escape all the depressing poverty outside the gates. These children unconditionally loved me and accepted someone so different from them. They brought joy to my heart and made all the unbearable humidity, mosquito bites, no electricity…quite bearable.
Once I made the mistake of seeing them so “normal” I forgot about their disabilities as we played Duck, Duck, Goose and London Bridges. What could have been a disaster with a kid feeling miserable he couldn’t run to catch the tagger turned out to be a time of peals of laughter as I picked up the kid and raced around the circle with him sticking out like an airplane wing. I also nearly cried because I was touched so much seeing the tagger slow down just a bit to let the ‘goose’ get close and nearly touch her. The little ones who couldn’t walk at all loved being the bridge and getting to catch the unlucky victim on “my fair lady” and shake her up. These memories will always cheer me up whenever I am feeling down. I especially need to remember them whenever I get in a mood to complain about something I don’t have.
Going back to China after my time in India was difficult because I didn’t have time to debrief and process everything there. I am super thankful for Skype and the one conference call I was able to have with my teammates who were back in New York. I hate to admit it, but sometimes my current life occupies every thought and effort that India gets placed on a back burner. Then God places little reminders in my life. I’ll be cleaning off my desk and find my framed photo of our team at the Taj Mahal. One day we were trying to test whether a photo CD would play on the Chinese TV/DVD we had in the common room and I remembered I had a photo CD from my time in India. Showing it for just a few minutes brought back so many memories and touched the other teachers who watched and asked questions of the orphanage, the slums, the center for the elderly. No matter whether I have a chance to go back to China, the lessons I learned, the stories I heard, the hands I held, lives I touched - these will stay with me and remind me what a blessed life I’ve been given and how I must always use my talents and gifts to make the world a better place for others.
